The Other Mile High Club

I hate flying. I am overcome by irrational fears that consume my thoughts until I reach the gate of my destination.  Don’t get me wrong, I love travelling.  I love travelling far distances and even across oceans, I just hate getting there.  My husband has started suggesting I “take something” to calm my anxieties before my flights. I don’t even like to take aspirin so making the jump to an anti-anxiety pill is highly unlikely.

Currently, I am aboard a full flight heading home from a great trip to Montreal.  Cue rain storm and crying baby and I have the making for a terrifying assent into the air.  Part of my problem is my complete lack of understanding of physics. I just can’t fathom how a plane, a humongous airplane that weighs… a lot…can stay up in the air. As the plane climbs so does, what I can best describe as, my sheer terror.

The physical realization of my stress comes in the form of holding my husband’s hand and squeezing it as hard as I can as a form of release.  I often don’t open my eyes until we are “safely” flying at 30 000 feet.  My heart rate rises to dangerously high levels and I have caught myself rocking in my chair which the sight of might actually cause fear amongst other, otherwise happy passengers.

When flying through clouds I am sure we are going to fly into the path of another plane. Turbulence is every wary flyers worst nightmare. It is at this point that I start wondering if I have left things properly in order for my children in the event that I was to die.  Death is ultimately what drives all of this fear. If I could only know that each time I fly, I would arrive safely I would enjoy the experience of soaring through the air so much more.

My anxieties do subside when we are at our cruising altitude and it’s smooth sailing or…flying I guess.  The next hurdle I have to overcome is on the descent where fortunately my fear of dying dissipates but is unfortunately replaced with terrible air sickness.  It starts with uneasiness in my stomach that grows until I break into a sweat. I desperately reach for the fan to blow cool, “fresh” air on me. I do not want anyone to touch me or talk to me at this point. I try to go to my happy place to avoid having to reach for the barf bag. How humiliating it is when it gets to that point.  All of my well planned travel outfits and hair are thrown out the window when I start heaving into a bag, a complete spectacle in front of complete strangers.

A whiter shade of pale, I emerge from my trip disheveled but alive.  And I will do it again, the next time a great vacation calls.  I will not let my unfounded fears stop me from enjoying my life.  A life full of experiences that are often bookended with irrational thoughts and sometimes even behaviours which only makes the times in the middle, the parts that count, that much more meaningful.

Our Favourite Breakfast

Sunday mornings in our house mean one thing – pancakes.  It is on this day (well, morning anyway) that my son loves me best. You see, syrup is the drug of choice in our house. We go through more bottles of Aunt Jemima in a month than I`d ever like to put on public record.

I found this pancake recipe years ago in a magazine and have been feeding my friends and family from it ever since. I`ve tried others but they`ve never received the fanfare of the originals.

Pancake day gets treated like a special occasion. We spread out a table cloth and set a proper table.  It`s as if the pancakes demand ritual…or maybe it`s just my screaming kids making the demands. This breakfast is best enjoyed with tea and coffee and orange juice and fresh fruit and of course, your favourite company.

Buttermilk Pancakes

2 cups all purpose flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon baking soda

½ teaspoon salt

3 tablespoons sugar

2 large eggs, lightly beaten

3 cups buttermilk

4 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

                Plus another tablespoon or so for griddle

Fresh blueberries and strawberries if available

Heat griddle to between 300 and 350 degrees.  Whisk flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and sugar in a bowl. Add eggs, buttermilk, and 4 tablespoons butter; whisk to combine.

Cook away! (Freeze leftovers and toast on busy mornings)

A Toast

My sister was married on Friday at a beautiful ceremony framed by a river on one side and a magnificent garden on the other.  The sun was shining,  a gentle breeze was blowing and butterflies actually danced around us during the service. It was as if Mother Nature and my sister had conspired to make hers the most glorious day of the summer.

My kids absolutely rose to the occasion and their good behaviour was noted by many. They were rewarded at the reception with copious amounts of soda and basically left to their own devices.  Eric was a good sport with two bum knees and I breathed a sigh of relief when my duties were over at the conclusion of my speech. 

It was my sister Kara who originally had the honour of writing and delivering the toast to our sister Nikki.  Over the course of a week, Kara employed a tactic she has been perfecting which she calls 'a gradual release of responsibility'. Below is the speech I wrote (with some assistance) and shared at the wedding.

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To begin, a toast to the groomsmen – good friends to Nick, and now Nikki, you all look smashing. Cheers. On behalf of Kara and myself, I’d like to take this time to recognize Nikki, our sister, at this momentous time in her life. In the past, our relationships with each other involved stealing clothes, fighting over the phone and generally trying to stay away from each other. Now, we enjoy Sunday dinners and mom and Doug’s, afternoon tea at Langdon Hall, sharing clothes and talking about our favourite reality TV shows.

 

Kara and I both like titles so the title of our speech is On Her Way to Love.  The reason we called it this is because we’re basing our speech on the ideas of Bloom’s Taxonomy of Learning – the cognitive domain. Might I just remind you that Kara is science teacher so using Bloom’s was an obvious choice for a theme for a toast at a wedding. The revised Bloom’s taxonomy recognizes six domains: remembering, understanding, applying, analyzing, evaluating and creating. The categories range from simple to complex and one can only move to the next domain once the previous one has been mastered.

First is remembering or to recall previous information. So today, let’s remember:

-Your wonderful childhood – you were raised in a home where you always knew you were loved, where family was always first and where the sky was the limit

-Your friends, new and old who have been there with you at primary school play dates to university pub crawls and exams to the adventures and fun you have today

-Let us remember all of the rules you broke – a path traditionally blazed by older siblings – this was not, however, the case in our house

-One specific memory is when dad caught you drinking for the first time. When you woke up in the morning he asked, were you drinking last night? Yep. Are you going to do it again? Nope. OK go back to bed. Wow. Tough love.

-Speaking of Dad let us take a moment to remember those who cannot be here today to celebrate this special day with us.

Second is the ability to understand. Hmm. What do you need to understand on your wedding day? That one day maybe your husband will slip on some stairs during a bachelor party, tear both of his MCLs and require 24 hour care?  That would require a lot of understanding. 

Maybe it is understanding you will have to go to work while Nick enjoys his summers off.

Maybe, it is understanding how your past experiences have shaped who you are.  Friendships and hardships, relationships and your times abroad -these have all contributed to you truly knowing who you are at this moment in your life.

Next, is applying.  You were able to apply your life lessons to become the person you wanted to be. That is the person you are today which made it possible for you to find the true love of your life in Nick.  You have learned patience, generosity, kindness and to have a good sense of humour. Several years ago, Nikki once described herself to us as funny and Kara and I just looked at each other like, “What is she talking about?” However, in the past couple of years, in growing even closer to Nikki, we have witnessed her good sense of humour so we will finally give you that.  Most importantly, you have more than ever, the ability to laugh at yourself now. And we all enjoy laughing at you as well.

Nikki has applied her life lessons in other ways as well. She usually makes good decisions; Nick is clear evidence of this. Nikki has also shown the ability to learn from her mistakes, she always lands on her feet and she has no regrets.

The next domain is analyzing. When Nikki met Nick she had to analyze if something so wonderful could really be happening. We all could see that she was head over heels for him but she couldn’t help but use her analytical mind. She had to audit, if you will, her too good to be true boyfriend. 

Evaluating is the next step.  The Bowman’s sized up Nick. The Delic’s sized up Nikki and then all of us in this room took our own time to evaluate the relationship. It didn’t take long for anyone to see how happy these two people made each other. Women are often told to marry a rich man.  Now, teachers are notorious for how much money they make but Nick’s true wealth lies in his character.  Nick is patient. Anyone that marries a Bowman girl must be patient. He is extremely loyal to his family and friends. He is giving of his time whenever it is needed.  Nick is handy (Kara wanted me to say good with hands but I said no, too inappropriate).  But, most importantly, Nick offers Nikki the support and balance she needs to reach the true potential of the person, wife and soon to be mother she was meant to be.  We have truly never seen Nikki so happy. Thank you for bringing such joy to her life.

The final and most complex domain of Blooms is creating. It is here that together, the Nick’s (their trademark name), will use all that they’ve learned to create a future together. That future will hold fulfilling careers (in teaching and accounting…really?),  a beautiful home, a family to fill that home, special memories and a legacy of two amazing people who fell in love and shared a beautiful life together.

And, even if they didn’t have all of these wonderful things going on in their life, they’d still have to get married because Nick knocked my sister up.

Cheers to Nick and Nikki who together have conquered Blooms!

Some Days

Some days go like this...

Had a panic attack during my MRI when I realized I had left a bobby pin in my hair. I thought I was going to suffer some kind of brain damage. I actually had to press the panic button. Who does that?

Found out my husband tore both of his MCLs...yes, I said BOTH. He is now laid up in bed for up to a week and then we'll see from there. I am now not only a servant to my three children but also to him. I guess it's true what they say - what goes around comes around.

To conclude the day, my daughter dumped an entire bag of dog food out and onto the floor. I swept it up, along with all of the dirt, and put it back into the bag.

Recipe Books

A recipe book - pages and pages filled with glorious instruction on food preparation and pictures that if you could, you’d eat.  I buy recipe books like other women buy shoes or purses.  They pull me in and I just can’t get enough of them.  To me, a recipe book is the start of something wonderful.  It offers the anticipation of something delicious or of an evening spent with good friends. Their forwards remind me of why I love to be in the kitchen for hours and they validate that use of time as time very well spent.

Recipe books line the shelves of my kitchen. Some are new and shiny, while others show their wear and prove through their ripped pages and loose bindings that they hold recipes that have been, or will be, passed down through generations.

One of my favourite things to do when I visit friends is to look through their collection of recipe books.  I ask a lot of questions about which their favourites are and how they came to choose the books they did. I want to try their recipes or, even better, have them tried on me.

I’m not sure when exactly this admiration of books about food began.  I am not a chef but I do love to cook and bake.  I especially love to do both of these things for other people.  As one of my friends very eloquently put, food is my love language. It is how I show the people in my life that I care. 

Most recipe books will share personal anecdotes from their colourful authors. You might read about how they experienced food growing up, how they entertain or what good food means to them.  The next time you pick up a book filled with the music of food, spend some time in its forward and fall in love with your favourite recipes all over again.

August Menu

We had friends for dinner the other night and I must say it was delicious. There was pressure. He is a good cook and the ante is always a little higher when you know you’re feeding a natural in the kitchen.  I called Lisa to ask what they wanted. Really, I just wanted to know what he wanted and she quickly figured that out, “It’s not just about Mick you know.”

“Of course it’s not,” was my reply but it so was.  Anyway, here is the menu. It’s a crowd favourite.

BBQ Ribs

Warm Parmesan Potato Salad (thanks Natalie)     

Green Salad

Banana Cream Pie (thanks Martha)

Ribs
BBQ sauce
2 bags of mini potatoes (yellow or red skin)                                                                   
1 bunch green onion (chopped) 
4 egg yolks

Fresh parmesan(grated)                                                                                              
I pkg bacon (cooked and chopped up)
5 tablespoons corn starch

Caesar salad dressing                                                                                                                          
Olive oil, salt and pepper
1 cup whip cream (real please!)

Your usual greens
whole milk                                         
bananas
2/3 cup white sugar, plus 2 tablespoons
¼ teaspoon salt
deep dish pie shell

(note: I prepare the ribs first and set aside. Then, I get the potatoes going for the pot salad)

Ribs

I usually buy one rack of ribs for every two adults. I love getting them from the butcher.

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.

Cut ribs Into 2 or 3-rib portions; place, meaty side up, in a single layer in about ¼ inch of water. Cover with foil and steam roast (put in ovenJ) for 90minutes.

Transfer ribs to a clean dish and generously brush with BBQ sauce. My favourite is PC’s Smokin’ Stampede Beer and Chipotle.  Refrigerate for up to 24 hours. Great for making ahead of time but I’ve also been known to BBQ them right away.

BBQ on grill, adding more sauce if you like until they look good.

Warm Parmesan Potato Salad

Boil potatoes for 10 min. Drain and cut in half. Toss in some olive oil and add some salt and pepper.

BBQ in a BBQ basket until they look nice and done, a little browned (20-30minutesish)

Place in a bowl and toss in caesar dressing (I like Renee’s). Add bacon, parmesan and green onion.

Make sure you add enough dressing as the warm potatoes will absorb a lot.

Your Favourite Green Salad

Mine – good greens, cherry tomatoes, cucumbers, craisins and feta tossed in olive oil and balsamic.

Banana Cream Pie (this is a Martha Stewart recipe…I hope I’m not violating any copy rights!?)

If you can make your own pie crust that is always best but a frozen one is just fine too. Have it baked and ready.

Prepare an ice bath; set aside. In a bowl, lightly whisk the egg yolks; set aside. In a saucepan, whisk together milk, sugar, cornstarch, and salt. Bring to a simmer (do not boil) and then continue to cook, whisking constantly, 3 to 4 minutes.

Whisk a quarter of the hot milk mixture into the egg yolks; whisk in remaining milk mixture. Strain into a clean saucepan, and cook over medium-high, whisking constantly, until custard is thick and bubbles appear in the center, 2 to 3 minutes.  Transfer to a medium bowl, and cover with plastic wrap, pressing directly onto the surface to prevent a skin from forming.  Set in ice bath and cool for 30 minutes. I usually cool it completely in the fridge. It can be kept in there for up to 1 day.

Whip the cup or so of whip cream on high, adding 2 tablespoons of sugar. Whip until soft peaks form.

Line the pie shell with sliced bananas.  Cover with the custard and smooth into an even layer. Spread whip cream over custard. Refrigerate pie, loosely covered with plastic wrap, for at least an hour and up to 2 days.  Just before serving, add more sliced bananas to individual slices of pie.

Enjoy!

Life is Good

Don’t you love those days that just reaffirm that everything you are doing in your life is right? Those days that make all of the crazy, and I mean crazy, moments of the past days, weeks and months melt away. These are the days that refuel our love and appreciation of the people in our lives that sometimes make us the craziest.

Yesterday was one of those days. We spent the day with the kids at the beach. We devoted ourselves to them and making sure they had a great day.  We jumped in the waves, built sand castles, played at the park and ate junk food. We were happy. We were all happy and five people, ranging in age between one and thirty-eight, being happy at the same time isn’t always easy.

After a great day with the kids at the beach, Eric and I headed out for a night to ourselves. We love our kids but we also love to get away from them (that sounds harsh, but it’s true).  It’s as if we’re another couple when we’re out without our three (amazing) children. We laugh, hold hands, kiss and talk. Actually, we’re not ‘another’ couple, we’re ourselves…10 years ago.

This particular date night started at the movies. It was a great movie and one that reminded us how lucky we are to have each other and how happy we really are together.  So, we left the theatre feeling very much in love. This cinematic bliss was almost derailed on our way to have a night cap at our favourite restaurant downtown. I wanted to park and walk through my favourite neighbourhood and he just wanted to park much closer. My silence in the car was deafening and we parked in my usual spot and enjoyed a lovely walk to town.

We sat on the patio, ordered cosmos and did our best to ignore the cigarette smoke that was drifting our way. We talked about what was going on in our lives and our plans for the rest of the summer. There was very little talk of the kids and that felt right as so much of our conversation so often revolves around them.  After a long sip of my cosmo, I looked at Eric and said, “Life is good, isn’t it.” His smile back at me spoke even louder than my earlier silence in the car and I thought to myself, ``It`s even better than good.‘‘